everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize