what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
