My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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