It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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