is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
