Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
