I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
