i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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