I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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