the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize