It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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