I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
