it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
