even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
