STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
