Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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