Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize