I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Let's paint friendship bongs
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
