Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Randomize
