Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
