I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
