I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize