Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
