Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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