what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
