my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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