So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize