it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I think people are normalizing furries
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize