i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
