am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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