dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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