Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
