im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
