The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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