If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
