He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
