Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Randomize
