as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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