Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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