Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
splinters make it hard to masturbate
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
