I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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