do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
