I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
