I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
