I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
