I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
