he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
