How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
