Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
