That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
