I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm just crazy horny about you
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
