Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize